Freedom

The light through the blinds is dim, the air is still heavy and the car's wheels sound wet as they rush through the world outside. The rain always had a mystic meaning to us, although it also reminds me it's gone, and it should be buried with everything else that reminds me of you.

I'm exhausted, my eyes all swollen and still pink ish, my head still hurts. It finally came the time when I got physically tired of crying, with a sore throat from all the talking and the whimpering, and the yelling to the pillows. 

Outside, random music plays, people left and entered their apartments randomly, why, I could even hear the drop of a coin through these paper-thin, ancient walls. The humm of the fridge gets louder, along with the soft whirr of NAVI's single fan. There is no such thing as silence here, it annoys me, but it's a subtle distractor from my whirlwind of thoughts.

Just randomly browsing pictures on my Instagram, the need was so strong I just had to take a look, just a peek of our pictures. Eighty eight weeks, it read in an abreviation in the top corner. Has it been that little? We don't even look the same anymore... If it was, it seems the good times happened and ended ages ago. I really am tired. This ruthless war finally came to an end and though no one won, and I feel devastated, I'm finally relieved it's over. 

It can't be helped, I can't go back. Something snapped within me and I fell in love with my freedom. Me of all people! The one that loves her chains and holds them fastly when they will not imprisson her ankle! 

Suddenly dreams I didn't know were mine started sprouting, growing roots within my head, they felt bigger than me but not heavier, actually, they were weightless. Even my eyes saw colors brighter, and light filtered through like a summer's morning sun filtering through the bilnds, gently waking me up.